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How to screw up your music career

Written By Lizzie Arnold on 09/05/2014

how to screw up music career

This week saw Australian hip-hop legend idiot and Bliss N Eso frontman smack bang on the front cover of the news, for all the wrong reasons. The crime? Posting pictures in a wax museum, pretending to perform violent and sexually suggestive acts against wax statues of celebrities like Rihanna and Lady Gaga. Their punishment? A possible career-ending ban from youth broadcaster Triple J and an ever-growing crowd of outraged fans.

Many things are things to be learnt from this incident, particularly when it involves an act we have grown to know and love right on our front doorstep. Here are just a few things to avoid screwing up your music career in any shape or form.

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Do anything Justin Bieber is doing right now.

Justin Bieber’s latest film entitled “Justin Bieber’s Believe” recently bombed hard at the box office. Surprise, surprise. If there is one thing you can learn from this pouty, spoilt brat is that fame changes people – and not always in a good way. Racking up more mug shots than albums, Justin’s drunk driving offences of 2014 have left many tween Beliebers disheartened and disappointed. And while they may say that any publicity is good publicity, the Baby singer is slowly seeing a backlash, with fans turning their back on the previously untouchable singer. If Orlando Bloom’s hint wasn’t already the smack in the face he needed, then maybe the petition to get him deported from the US will get his music career back on track. Unlikely.

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Start your career as a child star

Girl next door Britney Spears was everyone’s favourite Mickey Mouse Club child star. Finding her place in every CD collection and So Fresh album of the ’90s, it looked like she would reign supreme forever. But this Lucky hit starlet was not the good girl we all thought we knew. When you peak at 16, where do you really go from there?

In 2007, Spears experienced a spectacular fall from grace which saw her shave her head, attack the paparazzi with an umbrella, lose custody of her children and eventually get committed to a psychiatric facility. Like too many of her generation, she illustrates the sad case of a child star that crashed and burned. While our hearts do go out to her, and from what it appears she is doing well $$$ in Vegas, it’s best to just enjoy your childhood years and have fame thrust upon you only once fully potty trained.

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Create unsuccessful publicity stunts

This year marks the 10th anniversary of Janet Jackson‘s infamous Super Bowl XXXVIII half-time “wardrobe malfunction.” The nip-slip in question, also known as “Nipplegate” not only left a bad taste in the mouths of innocent bystanders, but continued to be an ongoing legal battle for the pair.  Dare we say it, take a leaf out of Miley Cyrus‘ book on how to create a provocative and show-stopping publicity stunt, that consequently got her onto People‘s Most Influential list.

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Be an absolute dick

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realise what not to do when you are Chris Brown. This talented artist with a promising career has been plagued with anger issues, assault charges and courtroom appearances. Ever since he hit the scene with his debut album, it seems the rapper cannot stay out of trouble. In 2009, Brown was accused of attacking his then-girlfriend, Rihanna. When questioned about the attack in 2012 on The Today Show, Brown allegedly threw a chair through a window backstage. More assault charges have followed since this infamous incident, proving orange is the new black for this artist.

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Get a bad reputation

Nobody likes a diva, ever. While Azaelia Banks may have produced one of the biggest smash hits of 2013, 212, this fiery UK vixen takes no prisoners, and is not afraid to vocalise this via any means possible. As far as her music goes, she’s released the stellar EP, 1991, and a totally addictive mix tape, Fantasea. In terms of her personal life and all-round bitchy demeanour, she has really said some dumb stuff in the last year which has got her into hot hot water. Picking fights with her record label, Disclosure, Iggy Azaelia, Pharrell, Lily Allen, just to name a few, and also playing only a 90 second set at Melbourne’s Listen Out, Banks is now known only for her temperament rather than her rapping talent.